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  • hopefulromantic Hi Everyone! I need some advice. I've been seeing this guy for about four months. Everything is going "good" - we get along for the most part, have similar interests in common but I can't help listen to that little voice saying "he's not for you" that plays in my head every now and again. We don't really share the same values. I am very close with my family. He is not. He's more of a thinker, left brained, analytical person and I am more a lover, feeler and right brained type person. A topic came up where we were talking about his career aspirations and where he sees his life. He is very career ambitious (I am, too, but I would put love before a career when I think it's the right person).. Anyway, he basically told me that he's going to be looking for jobs out of state because he's in real estate development and he needs to go where they're developing property. I said, well, if you're planning to move one day, where does that leave us? I asked him what if we are so in love a year from now and things are really going great? He responds by saying "I can't make decisions that will affect the next 40 years of my life based on how I feel at that moment." How do you think I should take that? I want to be with someone who knows what they have when they have it. I feel like great love only comes around so often. I just fear that he's not the kind of person I'm really looking for. Like I said, he's more of a thinker than a feeler. He is very career ambitious and he seems like he will do anything to get where he needs to be financially in his 20's. Should I continue dating him or not? Please keep in mind, I was having reservations about us before this topic came up.. Thank you all for reading! :) 9 years ago   *   6 replies
    • Charly Listen to that little voice a.k.a. your gut. 9 years ago
    • TDOG Onward sister 9 years ago
    • dainty2014 For risk of of a cliche, he's just not that into you....... move along! 9 years ago
    • RAN If it's at all comforting/reassuring to you, him, or both, you can frame it as -taking a break- from the relationship to think things over. No matter what you call it… your gut may tell you after a day, week, or month that Yes, it was absolutely the right decision… (Or not). 9 years ago
    • metoday2015 It seems that after 4 months of dating it ay be a little rushed to be talking about what will happen if he moves. And if you have been having seconds thoughts maybe he is as well. Perhaps you would do well by "taking a break" to really get a better perspective in why you have that gut feeling. Like someone said here, I would listen to that feeling, it is there for a primal reason: survival (hence happiness and fulfill meant). If that is your feeling then this may not be the guy for you. And you keep at it, you may miss the right guy. Good luck! 9 years ago
    • PEACEQUIET Listen to the little voice. As someone who didn't and is getting divorced 5 years later, I wish I hadn't compromised so much. 9 years ago
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