I feel better reading all of these knowing I'm not alone. I've been married for 8 years but with him for 18 years. We have a 7 year old son. I knew from the start that thete was something not right about our relationship but I went on with it anyway. I treated his 2 year old daughter like my own when we first met. She is niw in university and we are very close. I always felt he was not the right match but somehow I thought we were perfect for each other. We fought alot but then made up...we enjoyed drinking and getting high together but then something happened. I went on a retreat and learned about Reiki and it changed my life. I came back and realized after taking my energy healing training that we were vibrating on two completely different levels and I had to leave him. This was after 7 years together. I found a job on a cruise line and moved to Europe to stay with my sister for a few months before my job started. He came to Europe and proposed and I said yes with a knot in my stomach knowing that I had jyst made a mistake. I know I sound pretty flaky but I just couldn't hurt him he had come all this way...I gave up everything to come back home with home. We married a year later and I thought I was Ok. We didn't even have sex on our honeymoon. Sexually thete has always been problems. I became pregnant 4 months after we got married and it was all downhill from thete for me. I have lost any feeling or desire for him and thete is no doubt in my mind I want out. I have been on this journey as a yoga instructor and you begin to look within and I realized that I have been lying to myself for sp long thst I don't like the person I've become. he's a good person and deserves to be happy and so do I. In my mind I'm already gone the only thing I am struggling with is guilt of having to hurt him and the fact that my child is going to be devastated. I can no longer continue in this marriage and I need to get out as I have also been getting sick alot lately from all the stress. How do you leave a good person? It would be so much easier if he was a lier and a cheater! I want to live the rest of my life authentically and I get excited about a future without him in it. This is no way a marriage should be. I don't want him to touch me and I feel nauscious when he does. My family and friends have been hearing me cry for years about my unhappiness and I realize it's my fault for ignoring my instincts earlier on.