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  • findingmyway I have been with my husband for 6 years and married for 4 of them. We met when I was 20 and he was 26. When we met I had a 10 month old son and our relationship went from 0-60 very fast. After becoming a single mom at the ripe age of 19 and coming out of a horrible relationship with his biological father, my now husband was the complete opposite of him. In the beginning of our relationship I struggled with wanting to be all in with him even though he claims he knew he would marry me on our first date. I often found myself wondering if I was truly in love with him or just in love with the way he treated me and my son. Now 6 years later I find myself feeling like something is missing in my life. I went from being a young mom living with my parents to a wife and stay at home mom a year later. I am just not realizing how much is missing from my relationship and after many years of trying to find some passion and excitement with my husband and just tired and miserable. We honestly do not enjoy the same things, have different outlooks on life and marriage and I am just stuck on what to do. Every bone in my body wants to be alone and have time to find myself and discover what it is that I want out of my life. I am 26 years old and all of our friends are significantly older than me. I feel so lonely most of the time and just wish that my husband and I could relate on a deeper level. I feel like he just takes care of me sometimes, but it makes me view him as a brother or caretaker rather than a husband. Anyone else experienced this? I don't want to leave thinking the grass is greener and then realizing that isn't true, but I can't shake these feelings and they have become so overwhelming that I feel like I am suffocating, even in our counseling. Thanks. 7 years ago   *   1 replies
    • olivia Findingmyway, I totally relate. I am also 26 and have been unhappily married for two years to someone I have been with since high school. I believe the only reason we got married was because we had never been with other people and we were comfortable and it was easy. There is no passion and there never has been. We are no more than roommates or brother and sister just like you said, and in hindsight I realize that is how it has always been. I thought we made a good couple because we never fought and so everything was easy, but our relationship is empty. I understand your desire to be alone and find yourself. It feels like I am so young, this cant be all that life has in store for me. I am also worried about finding that the grass is not greener on the other side. At this point I think I am willing to risk the possibility that I will regret leaving him, just for the relief of being alone and discovering myself, since I have almost never been single. I know I am selfish for wanting more when I have a husband who treats me well and who I get along with, but I agree with you, it is suffocating. We are both in counseling and are going to attempt a trial separation to see if all we need is some time apart to figure ourselves out. It is a baby step in the right direction I think. And it is better than doing nothing and being miserable! 7 years ago
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