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  • anonymous1 I initiated my divorce and it's 3 years later... And I still feel guilty and sad sometimes for dismantling our family. Although we are still very much family, as the years go by, we each become more I to our own worlds and less connected, which is obviously the point of divorce, but I long for that safety of the "safe" marriage... Being with someone that you KNOW won't leave you.. Kinda scary bring in the great unknown sometimes even thigh that is exactly what I wanted when I left my marriage! 9 years ago   *   5 replies
    • LOVEISCRAZY people seem to feel bad for the one who is left and the leaver is considered the "bad" one.... 9 years ago
    • RAN Totally agree, Anon1 It's totally human nature to want what you can't have... My wife & I had grown apart. I acted out. She gets mad at me, starts going out on her own. She falls in love overnight with a friend from high school. She says we're done. All of a sudden I'm a mess, couldn't stop thinking about her, full of regret, wanting her. 3 months later her foot's still on the accelerator with new boyfriend. But at least I'm starting to feel human again. You have to realize you can't make someone else do anything that they don't want to. You only have control over yourself. 3 yrs is a long time to be ambivalent and regretful...have you tried counseling? 9 years ago
      • anonymous1 @RAN.... not ambivalent or regretful. been in therapy for a long time and am okay with my decision. just feel sad sometimes and occasionally question myself. i think normal... :) 9 years ago
        • RAN Ah well, then yes...feeling sentimental and nostalgic... I got that gene too. Wish I could flip a switch like my ex. Time for a new relationship? 9 years ago
    • Boogie You should have no guilt. It's sad when two people should no longer be together. My wife initiated our break-up but I filed. She had the strength to recognize that our marriage was draining our spirits and we are better off apart. Now that I understand, I admire her courage. You should be sad that it happened, and allow yourself to be happy sometimes. 9 years ago
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