I'll try to keep this brief. Met my husband online. Was kind of going through a personal emotional crisis at the time and I was really not myself. We met a few months after we had been talking online. We lived in different countries. He was in Canada. I was in the states. I loved his personality when met online. And I loved our chats on the phone, emails, Skype, etc. He even looked so cute on Skype. But when I met him in person, I was not attracted to him. I was more repulsed by him to be honest. But by then, the emotional connection was so strong and I so wanted to be married and be with someone that I just overlooked it. And now I regret it. I way undervalued myself but I was 30 years old and wanted to be married. And the clock was ticking. And he gave me so much emotional support in my time of need that I just didn't want to let him go.
Then I got pregnant while we were still living in differentcountries. We were married but he was still immigrating. I kept pushing the physical attraction issue out of my mind. It's a mess.
Anyways, we are both finally living in the same country. We have two beautiful children. I love my kids. But my husband...
I'm not attracted to him physically and now there are aspects of his past and personality that really bother me. I want to love him the way he loves me. Because he loves me so much and I feel it.
I feel awful. To top it all off, I found myself being attracted to another man at work. We had a little flirtatious fling. But I guess I read too much into it. He's also married with two kids.
He and I don't talk anymore. We had a falling out. But I was genuinely attracted to this person and it made me wish I'd met someone in person that I was genuinely attracted to.
I don't know what to do.
I'm stuck and lonely and just wish I was with someone else,
Especially this guy from work. But I think I was just his toy. I don't think he loves me, but I think I fell for him.
I feel like an idiot.
I'm too afraid to get divorced because this is my husbands second marriage and he has a daughter from him first marriage that he pays child support to and I don't want to ruin him financially.
Help. I still fantacize about this co worker all the time. I recently unfollowed him on social media. I can't take it anymore.
Also, disclosure - my coworker became my boss and had to fire me and I reported him for sexual harassment so that was just like the cherry on top. I have issues. Probably the reason he'll never talk to me again.