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  • Newyorknative Is there anything left if sex is gone and my husband just tells me I am the one making him unhappy? I think I have finally come to the realization that this marriage is over. I have tried and tried but I think I was blind to the signs. I just need people tell me if they have gone through anything similar. He had affairs, I kept taking him back. He accused me of being negative and blamed me for pushing him to have these affairs. However I have been the only person who has been there for him at his lowest points in his life, getting fired for taking money from his company, getting caught having so many emotional affairs it seemed like he had some kind of addiction problem. Eventually he stopped being able to have sex and could not get it up any more. Again blamed everything on me. I don't know what is wrong with me and why I feel so sad and why I have been holding on to this marriage for so long. Am I crazy, I am a fool? It's been going on for 10 years and these past 2 years the sex was gone. What is wrong with me???? 10 years ago   *   4 replies
    • TIMBUKTU he sounds like a pathological narcissist. This guy writes really goof articles about it. http://samvak.tripod.com/. The only thing wrong with you is continuing to accept the blame. This guy sounds really toxic and like a DRAIN. 10 years ago
    • seclusion What is keeping you from ending your marriage? Kids? Financial situation? Have you just given up? 10 years ago
      • TIMBUKTU @ TOKYO201 @ SECLUSION ... i am on on the edge of my seat here.... tell us more! 10 years ago
        • Newyorknative @TIMBUKTU @ SECLUSION I have 2 kids who are basically grown. One is freshman in college and the other is 16. Financial seems to be part of the issue. Prior to 4 years ago I was a stay at home mom and did not have any financial independence. My husband made it clear he would not leave the house and I would have to be the one to go, which of course I would not do and could not do at the time. Since then I am back at work and have a decent job but I also don't want to compromise my lifestyle. Our kids really want to see us make it work and the sad thing is they see my husband not trying to fix us. He's in limbo and acting very selfish and the kids see it. And they say things to my husband and there is no AHA moment. My mother is a narcissist and I probably married one and I guess I need to come to the realization that he won't change. I haven't fully given up but I am starting to do things that are more selfish. I actually started an affair only to help me cope with the loneliness I feel. It's been nice for my ego but ultimately I want it from my husband. I just wished he could work on himself and realize how good he has it. he actually tells me that loosing me will be his biggest regret and that is what scares him the most but basically he still wants to separate, but won't figure out how to do it. It's maddening and the only thing I can do right now is put my focus on this other person who is giving me the attention I need. He's single and knows I am married, which is dangerous, but for now I don't care. He's not the person I am going to leave my husband for but he is a nice distraction. 10 years ago
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