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  • Bjaz64 My issue is my husband is a good man. Great father, grandfather and even husband. He works hard, he's around the house, will do any thing for me. The problem? We are just roommates. We havent had sex fpr years. We don't hold hands, etc. Also, I'm not attracted to him at all. I've told him how its not normal. He says he's always tired and finely admired sex isn't high on his list. Its not even the sex as much as a connection AMD intimacy missing. He loves me and would hurt him so bad if I left. Also I work for him, just him and I at the business, which I hate, and he said I could still work there if we separate. (I'm sure he thinks if I leave it would be for a very short time. How do you leave when financially its close to impossible and knowing you would be hurting him badly? Ea 6 years ago   *   3 replies
    • JB I'm in a very similar situation- I feel that my husband is just someone I happen to live with- we don't really show any emotion towards each other and I am not attracted to him physically (not sure I ever have been) but at the time in my life he was "safe" having a good job and such- I still feel young and attractive (although I just turned 48!) and I'm not ready for a sexless coexistence. If anything, I'd rather be alone. He's a nice guy though and we have finances tied up so I sit and debate my next move. I don't think in your case staying at the job after you make the decision to leave him is wise- can you find other job opportunities to support yourself? 6 years ago
      • carissa I too am in a very similar situation. I have been married for 25 years and it is getting worse instead of better as I had hoped. My husband is my best friend, excellent provider, loving father and devoted, but sexually there is no chemistry for me. I think I realized who I was as a person later in life. I had been hurt in past relationships. I wanted to be loved and valued. He was so stable and good to me, I wanted to be in that kind of relationship. The sexual chemistry was never there, but I loved him for who he was as a man. Now I feel sad because I miss the true bond that sexual love brings. I avoid sex with him. The kids can sense that I dont love him the way I should. We have moved several times with his job and I dont have a stable support system or job at this point. I feel stuck and alone. I have told no one this. I feel scared to leave and very guilt ridden. 6 years ago
        • kellymary Wow I had no idea there were so many women in the same boat. Same for me, you both have told my story exactly. Married 19 years, 3 kids, married him because he was safe and have not been happy in YEARS. It is terrifying going forward though, but I know I have to for my sanity. 6 years ago
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