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mwaters
On vacation with new significant other. Enjoying myself but get this weird haunting feeling when I see other people with their husbands and kids. A limb of mine that's gone. It's so strange having this dual existence: on the one hand thrilled and happy to be away from the city with my new partner, who makes me so very happy. But also full of grief over not being with my daughter and her dad. A Janus heart. Two things. Always at the same time. It's this strange new reality I'm in. Strange new air I breathe. Happy but sad. Grateful but grieving.