- megra Sigh. I sort of hate myself a little right now but here goes... I am in a long term relationship 8+ years. The first year was a normal early 20s heated relationship which resulted in pregnancy. Getting together I knew he had addictions but I was young and need I say any more really. My entire pregnancy he was intoxicated and many nights since, however I still believe he is a good and attentive father. I love and care about him but not romantically (which I have told him recently). Looking at our relationship I actually wonder if I ever loved him romantically or if it was infatuation and then hope of being a good family for our child. I used to want to get married and have multiple kids but I have stopped wanting that for a long time. Our sex life has pretty much been nonexistent since our child. He wasn't ok with it but I was. I am an emotional eater and ate my way to obesity and although small when we got together that is where he is now. This last year I have lost weight and gained some of my confidence back and I just feel done with our relationship and I just want happiness. He wants a chance to change and fix it and has been talking about self harm. To make matters even worse I have gotten myself emotionally connected to another person. If there wasn't a child evolved I would just say I'm done and leave it at that. I feel like I owe him a chance that I don't even want to give. I truly believe we could both be happier with different people but coparenting. I feel so lost.