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  • Jane45610 Okay I have been married for 15 years now. Have a 2.5 year old child. My husband and I married very young. I was 19. I have never truly been physically or sexually attracted to him. However, he is a great guy and there are many qualities I admire about him. He is very brilliant, funny, successful, handy, and a wonderful father. He has been a hardworking provider and we own a beautiful home. On the surface, I have everything. But I am completely miserable. I have no idea who I am and I am a walking zombie. I feel I married the wrong man. He is not a bad man, just the wrong man. Our marriage has been rocky from day one. We are not compatible. We have nothing in common and live separate lives outside of parenting. We snap at each other a lot. I worry it will affect my kid because she has witnessed it. We come from extremely different backgrounds. I feel I do not fit in with his family. I hate being around them. They do not live near us so when they come stay they want to stay a long time. They make themselves too at home. They are very smothering and I have to hide in my bedroom thus feel trapped in my own home. I have been feeling for the past several years that I should divorce my husband. Though I care deeply about him and do not want to hurt him or our child, I just cant shake this unhappy/empty feeling I have about being married to him. I cannot recall many happy memories. Most of them have been quite negative. I worry it will only get worse and then my kid will truly suffer from it. Has anyone else been through this and did you stay or leave? Do you regret your decision? 7 years ago   *   1 replies
    • hairymary Damn. I'm sorry if got your hopes up here- I am wondering to stay or leave too but your post makes me think I really should leave if things don't change soon. I'm already on relationship-auto-pilot with my husband after 5 years...or FOR five years and I don't want to be like this for most my life. My husband is overall a good guy too- on paper. No cheating as far as I know, no abuse. The sad thing is if he cheated I wouldn't mind much because at least then I could divorce and not feel guilty about it. We have a young one and if I am honest with myself; if I could 1)Get childcare I could trust for my special needs child, 2) Afford to not worry about being on the streets/ having electricity/food.. . I would most likely be out the door. I worry about our child getting older as we become even more discontent. If you can get counseling...do it? You sound fairly well off. If not willing to do that then I think you need to dip. 7 years ago
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