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  • Karen7142 I have been with my husband for almost 10 years. I came on this site because I have to vent about my horrible in-laws!!!! They really put a strain on our relationship. Last year's Christmas, I set up a beautiful dinner for my mother in-law because it was her birthday. My Husband's brother and his whole family took out my mother in-law to buy a car, that evening, with no regards to the dinner that was planned. They sauntered into my home around 8:30, everything was cold, and I was not in the mood to host them at all. They have been doing this kind of thing for years, and at that moment, I just lost it. I opened a bottle of wine, told them I did not feel like having them over, and went over to my neighbors to recap the events of the evening. I do feel grateful that my husband stuck with me on this, but I can't tell how long this will last because he is usually completely controlled by his mother! We have no plans this year to get together. Does anyone else have any horrible in-laws that they need to vet about or advice on how to deal with mine? 10 years ago   *   8 replies
    • thenooge How often do you have to interact with your in-laws? How far away from you do they live? I've found the best way to minimize confrontations is to minimize the interactions. I know that probably sucks for them and your husband if they like seeing each other, but there might be a happy medium somewhere. 10 years ago
    • SallyAlexis Lucky you for having a husband that sticks with you. I think your in laws behavior is extremely rude and selfish. When my kids were little (5 and 2) we visited my husband's mother and sister out of town. We were staying at his sister's house, and went to see his mother and her partner with the kids. The kids were well behaved, but her partner was a little on edge with having the kids around. When we started over the next day his mother called and said that we could come, but if we brought the kids they would have to stay outside because her partner didn't want any kids in the house. It was cold out too! I told my husband that I wasn't going to go over if our kids couldn't come inside. He said he was going over without us. I felt he should up stuck with me and the kids. It all made me very sad. 10 years ago
    • Julie Anne One thing I've learned over the years are that some families will open their arms to a new spouse, and allow you to actually be part of the family. Some (maybe in your case), continue on with their own traditions only including the original family members. Yuck! I had a Christmas with my in-laws once that was so bad I actually LEFT! I took my husbands car and drove from San Francisco to home in L.A. WITHOUT HIM! 10 years ago
      • Karen7142 Wow. I really must say that these comments have helped and I don't feel quite so alone. His brother has never apologized to this day, neither has his mother, so I don't think we will be 'burning the hatchet' any time soon that's for sure. At least I am close with my family on the East Coast so that is a great comfort. 10 years ago
    • brooklynblue best advice i ever got about in-laws and my own family who drive me crazier is treat them all with the kindess i would treat someone in an insane asylum or on their death bed with cancer. seriously. it helps. 10 years ago
      • SallyAlexis Stellar advice BrooklynBlue! This will work on many fronts, like they can't come back at you and say you disrespected them. This sounds like a key ingredient for a successful relationship. 10 years ago
      • lulu c that's hysterical and quite helpful.... 10 years ago
        • LAURAMIDDLE Trust me you are just SO lucky your husbands with you on this one. My partner is the biggest mummies boy ever! I actually get jealous of the woman! 9 years ago
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