I need help to let this person go and move on and focus on...

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Moving_On I need help to let this person go and move on and focus on my divorce and kids. To wrap it up, the best that came in my life suddenly after 4 months of declaring how we were made for one another and we worth sacrificing to try and make this work (he lives far away, so this is mostly long distance), decided to try it out with his ex girls friend one more time (they are moving in together). Broke my heart but I started moving on and trying to forget about him and took some distance. Now he keep writing to me that he needs his friend back (me). That this is killing him and he still loves me, just that we live so far away from one another and he cannot just sit around and wait. So, listen to this. He wants me to give him 6 months. I finish my divorce and he tries living with his girlfriend for 6 months and if we find our way back to one another in 6 months, then we now it is forever. WHAT?? I need to remove this person from my life, but it is so lard to let him go. I think I have loved him all my life, since when we were kids. What do I do? How do I forget about him? DO I try to save the friendship? Is this friendship worth it? Please I need an objective opinion. I have to many emotions at play here :( 9 years ago * 12 replies User reported
- Moving_On so many typos, sorry :( 9 years ago User reported
- BELLA J. I'm all for second chances at love, but I don't think you should get involved with him again. In my opinion he's playing games because he knows that you're vulnerable right now. If he wanted to be in a serious relationship with you, the girlfriend would not have been a factor. Why wait 6 months?! Life is too short for indecisiveness. I feel that you should move forward with your life and focus on yourself and eventually you will find a happy, healthy relationship. It may be difficult, but you can move on. 9 years ago User reported
  - Moving_On Today, that is what I did actually. I told him I am done with this back and forth and I am moving on. I don't want to hear anymore how much he loves and misses me. It means nothing to me now. You made your decision and now I am making mine. But, of course this moving on is not very easy. I guess one day at a time 9 years ago User reported
    - BELLA J. It's not easy, but you deserve better. I've been where you are now. I shed a few tears and had my emotional ups and downs, however I knew that moving on was the best step for me. 9 years ago User reported
      - Moving_On Thanks for the encouragement Bella J. I have to come back here and read the post again whenever I feel unsure :) 9 years ago User reported
        
        BELLA J. I've learned that some of my most difficult decisions in my life were also for the betterment of myself. Time heals wounds and hearts. As I reflect on certain relationship from my past, including my marriage...they all taught me valuable lessons, the happiness, the hurt, etc. In a lot of ways, I am a much stronger person because I was able to let go, proceed with the emotions and move on with my life. One thing is true...life goes on. Don't stop living your life sulking over him. If you ask me, he messed up majorly and that's his problem. Hang in there and stay strong. 9 years ago User reported
        
        Moving_On Thanks Bella J :) 9 years ago User reported
- dynamic Is the friendship with it. No. Because he lives far, it's actual easier to move on. If you're not going to get back together than there should be no friendship. That's a disaster waiting to happen. I've been through it. The feelings are tricky. That's just the breaking of a bond. It takes time and energy but if you just merely focus on your life and ignore his communications, you will move on. We can block texts and calls now on cell phones and if you have a land line, it's built in. Sometimes you have to do the blocking to save you from yourself. I've done it a few times and every time I let go, better people come into my life. "Go through life with open hands". -Some monk in a mountain somewhere. 9 years ago User reported
  - Moving_On It has been two months now and I am the one limiting the communications with him. But still at least once a week, he will write to me and tell me how he is doing and how he is not happy in his relationship because he is not in love and hopes things will change. And what he feels for me still confuses him and blah blah blah... He wishes we were closer so we could be together and not this far from one another. No matter whether I reach out to him or not, he continues to share all the details of his life with me (and I mean details you share only with someone very close to you). He even asks me of my opinion of what he should do cause I am one of the most important people in his life (together with his brother). It is hell, its like he keeps breaking my heart over and over again with his selfishness. Its all about him. I have moved on, but still there are days that this hurts and I am starting to feel sorry for him. But I agree, if I didn't have to hear from him at all my life could better. So I am trying not to answer to him at all and soon he will get it, not write to me at all and forget about me and move on too. 9 years ago User reported
    - Moving_On Told him today that I will be out of reach for sometime, taking care of myself and I hope he can respect that. At first he was respectful and saying he totally understands. Then, 30 mins after the conversation was over, he writes to me again saying this is going to be good for BOTH of us, so we can BOTH move on with our lives. Man, even the one time that it is simply about me, he still turns it around and makes it about him (how he needs to move on too) :( . Oh, well ... 9 years ago User reported
      - RAN Sounds like you're actually looking at that with a little bit of humor, MO… That's good. You say he keeps writing you… But through what mode of communication? Hopefully you have blocked his cell number for texts as well as calls. You should also be able to block his email address so his emails are blocked, or at least go to junk… I had to do that with someone, and it helped. 9 years ago User reported
        
        Moving_On He would write to me through social media and all these different social apps, but since I asked him that I need some time to myself he has respected that this far. And I have to admit that I feel like a whole person again. There are hard days, but mostly my days are good and I am moving on. :) It feels much better now 9 years ago User reported

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