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  • plasterdust Women + Romance + Sex + Intimacy + (Dreams / Money) + (Children * 3) to the Power of Family = Scary. Men's Health doesn't publish any articles that help with that equation. One day I will be a free man and on that day I shall remove my clothing and stand under a rushing waterfall until my soul is cleansed. Then I'll have some A & W with vinegar on my onion rings....maybe I'll have 2 teen burgers...yeah...2. That's right. And some hoppy beer. 8 years ago   *   10 replies
    • want2bhappy Have you filed for divorce? 8 years ago
      • plasterdust No, but I have a rough timeline. Just being patient with finances and ensuring that the there are some gaps for thinking and emotional recovery between meetings. I find having at least a week to process between negotiations allows the rational mind to creep in and find new creative options that suit our family. 8 years ago
        • want2bhappy Ok, I was just wondering. It does sound that you are putting the cart before the horse on some of these items.The act of filing for divorce (at least in my state) is just the very beginning of the process. 8 years ago
          • plasterdust There's an online application process in some Canadian provinces for people when both parties consent, pre-arrange their details and have been separated for one year minimum. If one person is resisting then you can file and there's lawyers and what not, can take a few years. My partner is resisting the actual divorce process, I've asked why and it generally centers on her finances and independence. I think she figured we'd just be friends and room mates for a few years until she had saved a down payment for a nice house close to the one I bought. 8 years ago
            • want2bhappy That seems real convient. For her. I don't really know what else to say to that. Are you considered separated? Since you are both still in the same house. 8 years ago
            • want2bhappy *Convenient. Darn spelling errors. 8 years ago
            • TIMBUKTU PLASTERDUST.... you are very funny. have you started doing any dating? and.... are you in Canada? 8 years ago
            • plasterdust @happy (lol) Yes, there is a contingent for people who have to live together out of financial you can be divorced and/or separated but still live together in the same house in my province. We have been separated for a year+. @Timbuktu - Yep, Canadian to the dating, over the past few days some sort of internal switch that desired any emotional or romantic connection to females just shut off. Gonna work on this house so whoever gets it is happy and the kids feel comfortable, if that means I get "used" I don't really care...once that's all done then I'll deal with the legal divorce process, I'm just not quite sure why I'm doing all the work on a divorce I didn't want, but hey, waterfall and A & W is really something to look forward to. 8 years ago
            • want2bhappy Plasterdust, The time line you've got going is so different that what I just did. July-told him things weren't good. Counseling and many, many late night, earlier morning 'discussions'. November-told him I was done. January-filed. July-final. It does seem like she should be doing the leg work, since, from the sound of it, she wants (wanted) the divorce. It sounds like she has it pretty good though: house maid, child care provider, contractor, laundry folder, etc.... 8 years ago
            • plasterdust Wow! January filed and July final...ugh. Kudos to you. Every process is unique, so I'm just going through mine and learning along the way. She pulls her weight around the house. I'm just physically and emotionally undesirable to her, but convenient in every other way. I've read enough posts from women in her position on this site to know I can't "make" her like me again, just gotta wait a bit more, I know forcing divorce isn't right at this point in time. I dragged her through plenty of late night discussions. 50/50 at fault ratio...I think the only difference is I've let go of the past "transgressions" and moved on. 8 years ago
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